I love watching my grandbaby's mind work.

I watched him yesterday afternoon. He brought me his toy helicopter and little toy truck and said "Rshhh!". Yes, he wanted to play "crash the vehicles". So we sat on the floor and rolled the toys at each other, shouting "One two three -- go!" (Or, in Eitan's case, "un-too-tee GO!") Half the time they missed. But whenever they crashed into each other, I shouted "Crash!" and Eitan laughed hysterically.

After ten minutes or so of playing this, he got up and sat in my lap. Then he rolled the truck down my leg from the knee to the toes, chanting "down down down down". I wiggled my feet as the truck reached them and said "the truck goes Crash! on the feet". He looked at me, I repeated the phrase, and I could SEE the idea go click in his brain. He grinned broadly and rolled the truck down my leg again, chanting "down down down down"... and when it reached my feet, he dropped it, laughed, and said "rshh! feet!"

After he did this a few times, I picked up the helicopter and dropped it lightly on Eitan's feet, saying "the helicopter goes Crash! on Eitan's feet". Again, you could actually see him making the mental connection. He laughed like a loon, dropped his truck on his feet, and said "rshh! feet!"

Later, he wanted to draw. I sat him in my lap at the table and gave him a piece of paper and a pen. He scribbled wildly, saying "puppy, puppy", then petulantly threw the paper on the floor. I told him he wanted to draw a puppy, and he was frustrated that he didn't know how. I drew a simple puppy face, saying what I was doing as I drew.

Eitan impatiently grabbed at the pen, saying "share!". I gave it to him. He scribbled, saying "eyes... nose... ears... mouff..." then, as the scribble did not look like a puppy, he cried out in frustration and threw the pen and paper down again.

I repeated to him that he wanted to draw a puppy and was frustrated. I offered to help. I put my hand over his on the pen, then, slowly and carefully, we drew a simple puppy face. As we drew, we both said together "eyes... nose... ears... mouth".

We did this a couple of times, then he wanted to do it by himself again. This time, he scribbled over what we had just done, and, while it did not look anything like a puppy, his scribbles were much more controlled and smaller.

So -- budding artist, or budding special effects engineer?

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Thank you, everyone, for your good wishes and shared happiness about my biopsy scare!

My mother had breast cancer, her mother had breast cancer, her mother had breast cancer, and her mother had breast cancer -- I come from an unbroken female line of breast cancer survivors. It's very scary. I feel sometimes like I'm just waiting my turn.

What I keep reminding myself is that they all survived to wear mastectomy bras for many, many years. Even my grandmother's grandmother, with the treatment available in the 1920's, lived to a ripe old age. If I do get breast cancer myself one day, chances are that I'll pull through as well.

But not everyone is so lucky. My father died of pancreatic cancer just two months after he was diagnosed. Woof's mother is in serious condition right now with complications from colon cancer, only two months after a colonoscopy first gave her something to worry about.

This, and other recent events, have made me think very seriously about end of life issues. I've made notes about what I want to have done, how I want to be treated and what I do not want to go through.

I'm also thinking about "stuff", all the material possessions that I have. Why pile up things just to have them thrown away at the end? I feel the urge to organize, cull, and decide what I can get rid of now, so my children will not have to.

And I'm just... thinking a lot. Contemplating my own end. It's a very, very uncomfortable thing to think about, almost incomprehensible. I sure wish I'd accomplished more with my life by now.

Have you done any end-of-life planning? What do you think about what will happen when you cease to be?

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And now, what can I plan to cook this this week?

Sunday: Catfish with tomatoes and peppers on rice; banana bread. (This had been scheduled for the night before, but we went to a Chinese buffet instead.)

Monday: Pizza rolls for Magic Night.

Tuesday: Big salad.

Wednesday: Knit Night. Eat out with friends, or graze on leftovers.

Thursday: Pasta with Italian sausage and red peppers; salad.

Friday: Chicken something.... (TBD)

Saturday: Big brunch, graze for dinner.

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The results of the biopsy came back late yesterday afternoon -- it's benign!

I'll have more details on Monday, but I do know that my doctor recommends following up with another mammogram in six months.

I have a small but deep bruise, and am otherwise perfectly OK. Yay!

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Today I am grateful for:

1. My large, close-knit family. Neurotic and bickering as we may be, we are loyal to each other, we support each other, we are Family.

2. My friends, who keep me grounded.

3. In the wee hours of Tuesday night, I nudged Woof awake to say that I was scared, thinking of the biopsy the next morning. His response? He put his arms around me, said, "You have my full attention" -- and then he really listened. I am grateful for my Woof.

4. I have access to excellent healthcare, without having to worry about how I'm going to pay for it.

5. My grandbaby! Eitan is delightful, a pleasure to be with, and I get to spend time with him again tomorrow.

6. The sun actually made a brief appearance this week.

7. At the trivia night last Saturday night with my brother, lanielawyer, gentleartemisia, and four other people, we came in third in a field of over 20 tables. They were hard questions, too! and a good time was had.

8. This coming weekend I'll play in a Magic pre-release tournament. I'm excited about the new cards that are coming out. This will be fun, too.

9. Woof's mother is holding her own. We may be able to plan a leisurely trip to Phoenix in the spring, to spend her birthday with her.

10. I have clothes that fit, plenty of food, and a good car. My house is warm. My shoes fit. And by my bed there are a stack of books and a full bag of M&M's. I think I'll go join them now. :-)

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The Jewish mystic and hasidic rebbe, Reb Nachman of Bratslav, used to say this prayer. It's a good one:

Master of the Universe, grant me the ability to be alone!

May it be my custom to go outdoors each day
Among the trees and grass — among all growing things —
And there may I be alone,
And enter into prayer,
To talk with the One to whom I belong.

May I express there everything in my heart.

And may all the foliage of the field, all grasses, trees and plants,
Awake at my coming
To send the powers of their life-force into the words of my prayer,
So that my prayer and speech are made whole
Through the life and spirit of all growing things,
Which are themselves made as One by their transcendent Source.

Then may I pour out the words of my heart
Before your Presence
Like water, my Lord,
And lift up my hands to You in worship.

On my behalf, and that of my children, Amen.

— Reb Nachman of Bratslav (1772-1810)

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Menu planning for the week

Sunday: Cheesy Tortilla/Bean Casserole; salad. (It was only slightly overcooked, and reheated well.)

Monday: Meatballs for Magic Night.

Tuesday: Take cornbread to potluck dinner with friends.

Wednesday: If we eat at home, heat up the leftover chili.

Thursday: Plomeek pasta (pasta with a sausage and spinach sauce).

Friday: Tonight is Tu B'shvat, a Jewish holiday that celebrates trees in general, and the fruits of the land of Israel in particular¹. So we'll have wine (grapes), challah bread (wheat), barley cooked in broth with onions and mushrooms, salad with olive oil dressing, dates, figs, and pomegranate juice.

Saturday: Catfish cooked with tomatoes, rice, peas.

1. The traditional "seven fruits", as listed in Deuteronomy 8:8, i.e., wheat, barley, grapes, figs, pomegranates, olives, and dates.

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I want to get all the grumbling out first, then I'll make myself feel better, I promise.

( Click here for some serious bitching and moaning and feeling god-damned sorry for myself )

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As usual, things change!

We went out to dinner with the knitters on Wednesday night, to Guido's. Good food, and just pricey enough to feel like a treat without breaking the bank. That means that I still have chili in the freezer, which will be a good meal sometime next week.

Also, since mushrooms were on a fantastic sale, I made mushroom pie for dinner last night. The Sausage Pasta will just have to wait. Mushrooms take priority, people! (I bought five pounds of lovely button mushrooms, made two big mushroom pies, and sauteed up the rest to freeze for later use.)

Tonight we're back on track as far as the menu planning goes, with a cheesy tortilla/bean lasagna in the oven already and the salad in the fridge. Cheesy tortilla/bean lasagna is more of a concept than a recipe -- a big flat layered casserole using corn tortillas instead of noodles, chili beans instead of meat, and vegetables with cheddar cheese instead of ricotta. Spinach or chard is good in it, as is canned corn, fresh peppers, and sliced tomatoes. I had a lot of beans today so there are fewer vegetables.

But it's getting harder and harder to plan, as more and more contingencies pop up.

Chief among them: bbwoof's mother is not doing well, suffering complications from surgery to remove a colon tumor. We'd be in the car right now, driving to Phoenix to see her, except that there's my biopsy next Wednesday.

Woof says that the inside of his head itches.

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It is amazing how completely unmotivated I feel.

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I had a routine mammogram last week, which found a very small abnormality deep in my left breast. Yesterday I got a second mammogram, a close-up of the area, that confirmed the presence of a lump. It's too small and deep to be felt, only a mammogram would have caught it.

A week from today I'll get the lump biopsied. There's a very high rate of false positives from mammograms -- many lumps are found that turn out to be completely harmless. Even if this one turns out to be cancerous, it's so small and early that chances are very good that I'll simply have it removed, perhaps get one dose of radiation therapy just to be sure, and go about my life.

I'm focusing on the positives, and trying to be zen about it.

I can tell that I am worried, though, because I keep doing stupid zoning-out things, like leaving the stove on. On the other hand, I'm sleeping well, and that's the key sign for me.

The weird thing is the serendipitous way the lump was discovered. Remember, it absolutely cannot be felt from the surface. I've tried, two doctors tried yesterday, this is a well-hidden little lump. Also, it's so small that it's probably only been there for a month or so.

My OB-Gyn reminds me every year to get a mammogram, and I do get one most years. Usually in the fall, right around the time I get my yearly Pap smear. But this past year I had trouble scheduling one. The available appointments were at inconvenient times. I scheduled one for late November, then rescheduled due to a conflict with work, then had to cancel the newly-rescheduled one. More weeks passed without thinking about it.

Until eight days ago, when I was driving home from babysitting my grandbaby and stopped at the supermarket to pick up milk and bread and bananas. The Barnes-Jewish Hospital mammography van was in the supermarket parking lot. I remembered that I still hadn't gotten the old boobs scanned, and decided I'd just step in and see if I could schedule a mammogram with the van the next time it was in the neighborhood.

The mam van is a bright pink camper with two tiny dressing rooms and an exam room at the back, a narrow by comfy waiting area in the middle, and the world's smallest desk up front. The nice woman sitting at the desk told me that they could actually see me right then. There had been a few cancellations, and they had been debating simply closing up and leaving early. The radiology tech would be happy to give me a mammogram before they went, though.

So I shrugged and slipped into a drafty gown and got my mammogram. Good, now my doctor wouldn't scold me next fall! I quickly got my clothes back on and hurried through my shopping. By the time I came out of the store, the mam van was already gone.

I think I've got a guardian angel.

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Wise, wise words.

Love
by Czelaw Milosz

Love means to learn to look at yourself
The way one looks at distant things
For you are only one thing among many.
And whoever sees that way heals his heart,
Without knowing it, from various ills.
A bird and a tree say to him: Friend.
Then he wants to use himself and things
So that they stand in the glow of ripeness.
It doesn't matter whether he knows what he serves:
Who serves best doesn't always understand.

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Hmmmm, here's the plan:

Sunday: The annual Zoole family get-together to remember Dad. We'll have Guinness tonight, and probably some food to go with it.

Monday: Magic night! Make party pinwheels with flour tortillas, spiced cream cheese, and chopped turkey ham.

Tuesday: Big salad

Wednesday: Knit Night; heat up the leftover chili and cornbread.

Thursday: Pasta with sausage and olives, green beans.

Friday: Cheesy corn tortilla and bean lasagna, salad.

Saturday: Brunch with pancakes, eggs, sausage patties, canned fruit.

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Woof has to go in to work today. It's the beginning of a new semester, and he needs to make badges for all new students at the medical school, nursing school, pharmacy school, as well as students starting new clinical internships at the hospital in physical therapy, social work, respiratory therapy, radiology tech, etc etc etc! The winter semester start is not as much work as the fall semester start, but it still requires much overtime.

I plan to send him off with a nice big brunch: blueberry muffins and sausages and tater tots and fruit salad. I'll put the muffins in the oven right after I post this.

Other things on today's agenda are washing my hair, running a few loads of laundry, baking a cake, and knitting like a fiend. Man, am I domestic!

Tonight I'm going to a Trivia Night fundraiser. I have fun at Trivia Nights. I'm usually very good at them, as long as there aren't too many sports questions. I am a veritable font of semi-useless knowledge.

I said I'd bring chili and cornbread for the table, so that's more cooking to do. (Got to remember to make the cornbread.) I've got the chili started, at least. There's a big crockpot full of beans and epazote simmering away right now on my kitchen counter. I'll freeze about half of the beans for use later, and use the rest to make the chili.

Let me take a moment to plug epazote, guys! Ever since I discovered it, I always cook beans with epazote. It neutralizes bean gas like magic! Epazote makes the beans taste beanier, while preventing flatulence -- it's all good. :-) (If you are looking for epazote in the US, Penzey's carries it.)

Well, it's time to start baking...

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Today I am thankful for:

1. maiabee8's new job -- yay!!!

2. Oh look -- I found a dark chocolate truffle bar that I'd forgotten about when I reorganized the freezer this morning.

3. Help with de-tangling the tangled skein.

4. Finally figuring out home-made tortilla chips. They are so good, and so much better for you than commercially made.

5. A very good skycap at the airport made it easy to get nocxavier's Grandmother to her plane in comfort.

6. Knowing that I am part of a network of friends that help each other.

7. Getting Woof to work on time this morning, even though we overslept -- from wake-up to car in seven minutes, are we good or what?

8. A snuggly Woof to oversleep with.

9. My daughter said I am a Good Grandma. (melts)

10. I have a pantry full of food, warm clothes, running water, 9 rolls of toilet paper, and an extra bag of rock salt. I am prepared for winter -- bring it on!

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Velvet Shoes
by Elinor Wylie

Let us walk in the white snow
In a soundless space;
With footsteps quiet and slow,
At a tranquil pace,
Under veils of white lace.

I shall go shod in silk,
And you in wool,
White as a white cow's milk,
More beautiful
Than the breast of a gull.

We shall walk through the still town
In a windless peace;
We shall step upon white down,
Upon silver fleece,
Upon softer than these.

We shall walk in velvet shoes:
Wherever we go
Silence will fall like dews
On white silence below.
We shall walk in the snow.

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Hey St Louisans: Who's up for Trivia this Saturday night?

My Mom is running this fundraiser for Bnai El Temple in Creve Coeur. I want to support my mommy, of course, but I also really like Trivia nights. I'm good at them, too -- I once won a trivia night with a table made up of just three people: Woof, my nephew Sam, and me.

So, who wants to join my table this Saturday? Doors open at 6:30 PM and play begins at 7:00 PM. Cost is $18/person.

There will be free soft drinks and free snacks. Let's all bring food for the table, too! (This is a synagogue, so no pork or shellfish, please.) I'm bringing chili and cornbread. Yummmy!

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Books completed in 2010:

1. Zen and the Art of Knitting, Bernadette Murphy. ( Click for review )

2. Sarah's Key, Tatiana de Rosnay. ( Click for review )

3. The Empress of India, Michael Kurland. Serendipitously picked this up at the library almost at random. What a fun book!

This is the fourth in a series of Professor Moriarty novels -- set in the Sherlock Holmes universe, but with Professor Moriarty as the hero. Great plot, great characters, witty banter that had me quoting bits out loud to Woof as I read, all around good fun. I need to check out the rest of the books in this series. Great read.

4. Mason-Dixon Knitting: The Curious Knitter's Guide, Kay Gardiner and Ann Shayne. A modern-day classic based on the popular blog, this book serves up a double dose of confidence, humor, creativity and realism. I think I cried a little when I took it back to the library. "Mason-Dixon" goes on my "to-buy" list fer sher.

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I've been battling a sinus infection this week, which has left me tired and cranky most evenings. Don't wanna cook. Don't wanna make salad. Don't wanna start complicated project. Just wanna sit and knit simple baby blanket. Bah!

Woof made his own dinner a couple of evenings, out of crackers and cheese and sausage.

But I woke up this morning feeling... tentatively well. I still move my head slowly, and feel ridiculously pleased when it does NOT hurt to tilt my sinuses.

Is it time to get back on track? Yes, yes it is. And here's what the track will be this week:

Sunday: We'll be at nocxavier's place, on and off, most of the afternoon. It's his mother's memorial party. I think he'll have food (I know I'm bringing a cake). If we want something more, we'll have salad in the evening. Put the shrimp in the fridge to thaw for tomorrow.

Monday: Magic night! Cold shrimp with cocktail sauce, and the last of the cheese balls.

Tuesday: Take chickpea curry to Rivendell tonight.

Wednesday: This would be a good night for nopalitos frittata with home-made tortilla chips.

Thursday: Mysteries from the freezer. Thaw something unlabeled in the morning. Only three unlabeled containers left!

Friday: Spaghetti with sweet potato cream sauce, salad.

Saturday: Big brunch midday -- blueberry muffins, sausages, scrambled eggs, tater tots, fruit salad.

Bring chili and cornbread to Trivia Night in the evening.

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"During what month of pregnancy does a woman begin to look pregnant?"

Be sure to keep watching until Richard Dawson really starts to lose it, around 1:15.



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First line of first post of each month, 2009:

January
A friend once said that the home is the reflection of the soul.

February
The cable guy was supposed to be here between 10 and noon.

March
I am updating from a hotel room in Naperville, where 8 friends from St Louis have gathered the night before Jennie's funeral.

April
Wow, I just finished reading Jo Walton's "Small Change" trilogy, and I'm blown away.

May
I have discovered how to make me exercise: drop me off someplace so I have to walk home.

June
I am heartsick over the murder of Dr. George Tiller, gunned down as he volunteered in his church on Sunday morning.

July
Mamie beat her head against the bars of a little Indiana town and dreamed of romance and big things off somewhere the way the railroad trains all ran. (Excerpt from the poem "Mamie" by Carl Sandburg)

August
We are large hobbits, Woof and I, and hobbits like to eat!

September
I thought I'd used up my day's supply of adrenalin by 8 AM this morning.

October
Last Wednesday, for the very first time, I walked around wearing socks I had knitted myself.

November
Changes in plans.

December
Well, there was less cooking last week than I'd intended, and more lying around with my feet up.

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As you probably know, nocxavier is our friend, tenant, and upstairs neighbor. His mother passed away suddenly on December 23rd.

Noc and his sister are holding a memorial/wake/get-together this Sunday, January 10, from noon to 8-ish, at his place. Jan 10 would have been her 53rd birthday. Yes, there will be a cake.

Open house format, drop in whenever you want to and stay as long as you'd like.

His mother's favorite color was red. You are all invited to wear red to celebrate her life -- she would have liked that!

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Ambitious, I iz it:

* Wash hand-wash-only dishes that have been sitting around for days.

* Finally make that tuna casserole. Also make the turkey strata. Make two pans of each, take one of each to nocxavier.

* Make big green salad to keep in fridge.

* Apply to at least four jobs.

* Cast on for the Complicated Scarf.

* Laundry!

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We followed the plan last week pretty well.

On Saturday we helped nocxavier and tsita with packing up and moving Noc's mother's apartment. Woof suggested we make dinner for everyone, which was a brilliant idea, so I browned three pounds of ground meat with several chopped onions, cooked two pounds of spaghetti, mixed them with two pounds of velveeta and a couple cans of cream soup, seasoned with a few splashes of Worcestershire sauce, and baked the whole thing for an hour to produce three pans of Big Emergency Casserole. This fed a bunch of teenagers plus four weary old folk, with some left over.

Moment to remember: I also set out a cheeseball and crackers. Sahara heroically managed to draw the cheese knife from the cheeseball, so now she too may be King of the Britons.

We need to cut way back on our spending this month, and eat up what we have in the house instead of buying more. Here's the plan for the week:

Sunday: Eat up the leftovers from last week.

Monday: Magic night! Little party sandwiches and a cheeseball.

Tuesday: Either take a 7-layer salad to Rivendell, or have chef salad and hot broth at home.

Wednesday: Knit Night, but Woof will be home early. Make a tuna casserole with macaroni, cheese, broccoli, and tuna. Serve with tomato salad.

Thursday: Nopalitos frittata, guacamole, home-made tortilla chips. Possibly bake the last of the sweet potatoes, too?

Friday: Turkey strata -- basically make stuffing with the leftover bits of bread I've been saving in the freezer, layered with the last of the leftover turkey. Use lots of sauteed onions and celery. Serve with simple green salad, apple pie.

Saturday: Breakfast for dinner tonight! Sausages, scrambled eggs, pancakes, orange juice, blueberry muffins.

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ysabetwordsmith will be holding a Poetry Fishbowl at her LiveJournal tomorrow, January 5. The theme is "hard sci-fi".

What's a Poetry Fishbowl? It's poetry made to order! Go fishing for a new poem by giving ysabetwordsmith an idea that fits the theme. She'll work with a topic, situation, emotion, or character -- or give her a style, a meter framework to work within, and she can do that too.

Some of the resulting poems will be published for free on her LJ. To make others available to the public, she'll ask for donations.

ysabetwordsmith is a published author and poet, of extraordinary talent. Support the arts, support the imagination, get yourself a poem!

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Books completed in 2010:

1. Zen and the Art of Knitting, Bernadette Murphy. Not as interesting as it looked on the shelf; I'm glad this was a library book and not a purchase. Too much "Bernadette' spiritual journey", not enough knitting. Still, worth finishing.

2. Sarah's Key, Tatiana de Rosnay. This novel was a Chanukah gift from my Mom. Terrifying story, well told. (A little too much romance-novel angst in parts, but good characterization and plot.) Again, not one I would buy for myself, but definitely worth the read. Might be a good bookclub read.

The book is based on a little-known incident in Vichy France, the round-up of Jewish Parisians in the Vel' D'Hiv'. Ordered by Nazis but carried out by French policemen, the round-up including 3500 children. They were transported to Auschwitz and immediately gassed. But a few children, a very few, managed to escape the Vel' D'Hiv' with the assistance of police officers and others who looked the other way.

This is the story of one of those children, and how her life touched the life of a journalist in 2002.

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Woohoo! I completed the complicated project for maiabee8!

I had to learn so many new techniques for this -- the Figure 8 cast-on, applying i-cord, crocheting a chain, applying crochet, making a bobble, making tassles -- it was a definite Learning Experience, and I'm afraid it looks more home-made than I'd like. But. Complete! Woohoo!

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I had some great resolutions last year. I lived up to a couple of them, but most fell by the wayside.

So, this year, SIMPLIFY!

For 2010, I resolve to:

1. Take a walk every day, even if it's just 15 minutes.

2. Serve salad with every meal (or at least a raw fruit).

3. Clean the refrigerator on a regular basis.

4. Keep track of the books I read.

5. Do a better job of keeping in touch with family and friends.

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By January 31, 2010:

1. Finish the legwarmers for my daughter Jo. I knitted these up last summer, but was unhappy with the bind off. I need to rip back and re-do them with this great stretchy bind off.
2. Finish the cute and complicated thing I'm making for for my daughter Maia. It's getting close to being finished now -- yay!
3. Finish up and send out five pay-it-forward gifts. I'm ashamed to say I completely forgot about this until curiouswombat reminded me that a gift from her was on its way. Fortunately, I had started some of these about ten months ago, and all I need is to get buttons and some other finishing touches...
4. Knit up Pippin's Scarf for a Lord-of-the-Rings swap I'm in on Ravelry. I have enough yarn to make two of them, if I love it enough to want one for myself too! (Or as a gift for a friend?)
5. Get started on the baby blanket OR baby layette set for our friend John's baby, due in March 2010. I have 14 ounces of lavender cotton set aside for this already.

By mid-year (July 1, 2010):

1. Finish the Monkey Socks I started last year. One sock is complete, just got to get going on the next one.
2. Finish the Baby Surprise Jacket for Eitan's birthday.
3. Get the big Sooper Seekret project for Woof out of hibernation.
4. And while I'm at it, dig out that chunky black silk yarn and make the gloves for Woof that I keep putting off because I'm afraid of knitting with silk!
5. Get a good start on the holiday knitting, using up the stash yarn. Toys for Eitan? A couple of tea cozies? Some cute tawashis? And, of course, MOAR SLIPPERS.

By the end of 2010:

1. Complete at least one pair of cabled socks.
2. Complete at least one shawl.
3. Complete at least one moebius project.
4. Design and complete the shadow-knitted scarf I've been wanting to make for my daughter Maia.
5. Cut up all the plastic bags and knit something amazing out of plarn.

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I've got Interesting Stuff!

First, a common-sense answer to those who claim the decade isn't over yet. I couldn't agree more. Unless you're deliberately being ironically pedantic, just... get over yourselves.

Then, a common-sense answer to those who claim that Barack Obama hasn't done anything of worth. Again, I completely agree. The author even left out some highly significant but not well-publicized accomplishments like finally settling the Indian Trust lawsuit, or designated $8 billion dollars for high-speed rail so we can begin to enjoy some of the benefits of efficient public transport that most of the rest of the world takes for granted.

But, hey, enough with the common sense already, how about some fun!

shaharazad repeated his fabulous mash-up of tarot and geeky card games with a Magic the Gathering Three-Card Tarot Draw -- my results are here, and I'd like your help in tracking how well the prediction holds up through the coming year.

And, for the crowning glory, a wonderful bit of Americana with the greatest historian of kitsch EVAR, Charles Phoenix. (Found by dakiwiboid) I have got to make this pie-cake for my neighbor nocxavier!



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So, it's almost time for the end-of-year memes. But. Before that, here's a fun, short, getting-to-know-you meme I ganked from maiabee8.

If you respond to this, I will:

1. Tell you why I befriended you.
2. Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a color, a photo, etc.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours. (after some searching on my part)

In return, you must post this in your blog.

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Contingencies, contingencies, and moving stuff around. It always happens. Yet, it's still good to have a basic plan, even if you know you're going to have to deviate from it. What's the basic plan for our dinners this week?

Sunday: Spaghetti with Italian sausage and roasted red peppers; buttered green beans; crescent rolls; pie.

Monday: Magic night! Make your own sandwiches, with sliced cheese and lunchmeats.

Tuesday: Pad Thai tonight, since we didn't get to it last week. I am soooo looking forward to this. :-)

Wednesday: Turkey casserole.

Thursday: New Year's Eve, dinner TBD.

Friday: Beans and rice and greens, for luck.

Saturday: Breakfast for dinner, with pancakes and bacon and eggs.

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Last night my daughter Maia asked me for the recipe for a simple cheesecake pie I used to make for her when she was small. It's an adaptation of the recipe that used to be on the label of Borden's Condensed Milk:

1 8-oz. package cream cheese, softened
1 14-oz. can sweetened condensed milk
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup lemon juice
1 8-inch prepared graham cracker crust

The cream cheese should be at room temperature (if it isn't, you'll just have to beat it longer). Beat the cream cheese until smooth and fluffy. Beat in the sweetened condensed milk: use a rubber spatula to get all of it out of the can, beat at low speed until it's well-enough incorporated that it won't splash, then beat at high speed for two minutes or until there are no more chunks of cream cheese.

Add the vanilla and the lemon juice. Beat just until smooth, do not overbeat at this point! (You don't want air bubbles in the pie.)

Immediately pour into the pie crust. Cover pie and put in freezer to set.

Nice to serve garnished with mint leaves.

Note: If you want to top this pie with cherry pie filling or other goodies, use a 9-inch crust instead.

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This morning there was one dead mouse in a glue trap.

The glue traps are sold with the reassurance that the glue contains an anesthetic so the mice won't suffer. Drat. I sort of hoped that the shrieks of pain and horror from the dying mouse would scare off the rest of them, so they'd leave my house without me having to kill them all.

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I worked last Thursday, to fill in for a co-worker. I've put in more hours this week than I'd planned, which is great because I'll get paid more. But it also means I had fewer free hours to knit, and I was more tired when I did have free time. Crrrrrunch time!

I finally have gifts for all my family members, so I'm set for the family party tomorrow. Well, all except for seaming and sewing buttons on a couple pairs of knitted slippers. I'll do that while the cakes are baking.

Next week is going to be full of long hours, too. My friends' Christmas presents are going to be delivered rather late this year. And house-cleaning? What's that?

Here's what I'll be cooking this week, food for convenience and comfort:

Sunday: Pad Thai

Monday: Magic Night Holiday Party -- serve shrimp cocktail

Tuesday: I work at the mall tonight, so we'll have leftovers and/or sandwiches

Wednesday: After closing the booth at 11:00 PM last night, I'll be there again at 6:45 AM this morning to have it open again by 7:00. I'll come home and sleep! Fortunately I have home-made frozen convenience food. Tonight we'll have sausage pasties and baked potatoes with turkey gravy.

Thursday: I work at the mall all day again today. Dinner tonight will be Pasta with Peas and Bacon.

Friday: We always go out for Chinese food on Christmas day. It's a tradition!

Saturday: I will be working today if we have anything left to sell. For dinner tonight, how about chili in the crockpot?

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Just a note to myself -- I must make Jamie Oliver's Pasta with Bacon and Peas for dinner sometime soon. I even have all the ingredients at hand! (Well, all but the cream, but that's easily got...)

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A co-worker did not show up for work last night, and didn't answer his phone. The kiosk manager came to fill in for him so I didn't have to handle the holiday crowds alone.

He had been scheduled to open the booth this morning. Now I am going to do that. If he shows up, I'm to tell him to go on home.

I volunteered for this -- I could certainly use the hours -- but that makes today's turkey dinner a little more complicated.

I made the perfection salad last night, when I got home. This morning, I've already made the apple pie and assembled the stuffing.

I ought to be home around 2:00 PM. It's a 14-pounder and should take 3 1/2 hours to cook at 325. So here's the plan:
I'll get the turkey in the oven by 3:00 PM, brown the giblets for gravy, then put my feet up and knit a while.
At 5:30 PM I'll throw the sweet potatoes in the oven with the turkey, and take the stuffing in its glass casserole dish out of the refrigerator to come to room temperature.
At 6:30, I'll take the turkey out to settle, turn the heat up, and put the stuffing in the oven to bake while the sweet potatoes are finishing. I'll make the gravy and sugar snap peas, and set the table for dinner. Woof can carve.

Wiktory!

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Happy Chanukah, to those who celebrate it, and greetings of the season to those who do not!

I have not yet lit Chanukah candles this year, and won't be able to until tomorrow night. Our work schedule at the Hickory Farms kiosk was changed mid-week. I ended up working last night, and I need to get into work a few hours earlier than planned today. Instead of dinner at home yesterday, Woof went to a Magic tournament at South County Mall and got dinner in the food court there, while I got dinner at the food court at the St. Clair Square Mall. Both of us in the food court, but yet so far from each other. [Romantic sigh]

Today is catch as catch can. I'm eating a sandwich now, while Woof has heated up some leftover pazole. I'll food-court it again tonight, I think, and Woof will graze on leftovers and yummies in the groceries I bought this morning.

Here's what I'm planning for the week to come:

Sunday: Roast turkey, stuffing, gravy, cranberry relish, baked sweet potatoes, perfection salad, sugar snap peas, apple pie.

Monday: Magic Night! Cheese and sausage board, with crackers.

Tuesday: TBD. Dinner at Rivendell? Bring cookies or a vegetable. (Check with Tammie)

Wednesday: I'll be working all day at the mall, from 8:45 AM to 5:00 PM. That's a long time on the feet. I think I'll go directly to knit night to relax, then either out to dinner or feast on cold leftover turkey at home.

Thursday: Grilled steaks (sirloin was on sale today!), twice-baked potatoes, baby carrots, banana pudding trifle.

Friday: I work late at the mall this evening. Woof will probably go to Friday Night Magic -- and the food court -- again.

Saturday: This afternoon is our family Chanukah party and December birthday dinner. I'm bringing two cakes: chocolate chip cheesecake, and plain yellow cake with chocolate icing (to be Jen's birthday cake, as it's her favorite).

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Someone has elfed us! A very welcome gift card from an anonymous friend came in the mail.

Thank you, little elf, whoever you are. I am setting out a virtual plate of cookies and bowl of cream for you. Also baking cookies to give to co-workers, in the spirit of Pass It On. Thank you.

This entry was originally posted at http://beckyzoole.dreamwidth.org/34909.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

This meme, ganked from ysabetwordsmith, is intriguing and fairly accurate, I think. The only place it's a little "off" is the rating for friends and family. I have fantastic friends and family! (But no one I call Best Friend, which, I think, is what made the ranking a little lower.)

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7.6
Mind:	7.8
Body:	5.5
Spirit:	8.8
Friends/Family:	6.7
Love:	9.1
Finance:	6.7
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

( Life Score Analysis )

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There are mice in my house, nasty smelly mice.

I'd never seen a live mouse in this house before, although I did find a dead one last year. I'd hoped it was a fluke, but set out mouse traps anyway. This year, though, it's awful. I am sure I saw two separate mice yesterday, and there are droppings in the cabinet under the sink. YUCK!

Last night we put poison bait in dark corners, under the sink, and behind the refrigerator. I need to get new traps for the basement. I'll plug their entry holes with steel wool, as soon as I find them.

Mice outdoors, or in a cage? Love the cute little beasties. In my kitchen, though? I'M GETTIN' THE CARVING KNIFE!

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As I was hurrying through the mall yesterday to get to work, a woman stopped me. "Rebecca?", she said with a smile.

She looked familiar but I couldn't quite place her.

"Tina", she explained. "From Famous-Barr."

Of course! I had worked with Tina for almost seven years, in the MIS department of the Famous-Barr stores division of May Co. Her hair was a little different and I hadn't ever seen her in casual clothing before, but I should have recognized her. In fact, hadn't she gone on to Kohl's when Macy's bought us out? No, she said, and she named the company she worked for now.

"What are you doing here?", she asked in a friendly way.

Hurrying off to work, I answered, at Hickory Farms here in the mall. I was embarrassed, and tried to explain, with vague handwaves towards the kiosk, "It's, it's..."

"A job?", Tina supplied with a laugh. "An adventure?"

"Both!" I replied, and laughed back. We waved to each other, "Good to see you again!", and went our separate ways.

Two minutes later, I was kicking myself that I hadn't recovered my composure enough to exchange contact information. But the kiosk was inundated with customers, and there was no time to go off looking for her.

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Well, there was less cooking last week than I'd intended, and more lying around with my feet up. Woof made dinner one night -- he minced and sauteed an onion, added some cut-up hotdogs and a can of pork and beans, et voilà! Cassoulet à la Woof!

That means the pork shoulder will be roasted today. The rest of the week will be:

Sunday: Roast pork, baked sweet potatoes, mustard greens, cucumber salad, apple pie.

Monday: Magic Night. Serve Mini turkey meatballs with tomato sauce. Also bake banana bread, and maybe oatmeal cookies too.

Tuesday: I babysit Eitan this afternoon and work at the mall until late tonight, so Woof will graze on leftovers.

Wednesday: Baked ziti with roasted red pepper and Italian sausage.

Thursday: I work at the mall this morning and babysit Eitan in the afternoon. It will be good to come home to a steaming crockpot of Pozole!

Friday: Cheesy spinach quiche, salad.

Saturday: I work at the mall this evening, but lunch can still be an adventure. :-) What are those mystery packages of leftovers in the freezer? Let's thaw a couple and find out!

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I was visiting my Mom today when Grandma called to tell her what was in the gift boxes she had recently mailed her grandchildren. I overheard part of the conversation.

Grandma had gone in the nursing home van to the book store, and bought Colin Powell's autobiography for my cousin Dan. Since Colin Powell was not at the book store to sign it himself, Grandma said, she signed the book for him.

My Mom paused, then said, "Mother, why did you sign your name in the book you bought for Dan?"

"Oh, I didn't sign my name", Grandma replied. "I signed Colin Powell's name for him."

(I started giggling. Mom shushed me.)

"And guess what I sent Karen?", Grandma continued. She had sent my cousin Karen a package containing an invitation Grandma had received to a Christmas dinner party last year. "It was a lovely gala!", Grandma enthused, "They served Cornish game hens!"

With the old invitation, Grandma included the carefully cleaned and dried wishbone of her Cornish game hen. "I wrapped it very carefully so I'm sure it won't break", she explained.

I was shaking with muffled laughter at this point.

When Mom got off the phone, she said, "When I get to the point where I'm mailing my grandchildren old chicken bones, JUST SHOOT ME."

I disagreed. Because, after all, the entertainment value would be priceless. :-)

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"Say, Becky," I hear you ask, "When should I come to the mall at St. Clair Square to buy delicious Hickory Farms cheese?"

You should come at any time before Christmas Day, I'll tell you, and if you can't get to a mall with a Hickory Farms kiosk, you can always go online to HickoryFarms.com to purchase your yearly supply of tasty Ohio cheese and sausage products.

However, if you want to visit the mall at St. Clair Square in scenic Fairview Heights, Illinois at a time when I will be there selling cheese -- for it is amusing to harass your friend as she sells you cheese, is it not? -- you could come at any one of the following times over the next two weeks:

• Tuesday, December 1, from 5:30 PM to 10:00 PM


• Wednesday, December 2, from 9:00 AM to 6:00 PM (I'll take an hour for lunch from 12:30 to 1:30, so drop by then if you want to sample the glories of the food court.)


• Thursday, December 3, from 9:00 AM to 3:30 PM (One hour lunch break from 12:30 to 1:30.)


• Friday, December 4, from 6:00 PM to 10:00 PM


• Saturday, December 5, from 1:00 PM to 5:00 PM


• Tuesday, December 8, from 5:30 PM to 10:00 PM


• Thursday, December 10, from 9:00 AM to 3:30 PM (One hour lunch break from 12:30 to 1:30.)

I don't get a commission, but I do like keeping busy. So if you find yourself in the neighborhood, do drop by. The Hickory Farms kiosk is in the Central Court, lower level, right next to where Santa Claus sits and gets his picture taken with good children.

Seriously, guys, this cheese and sausage is very high-quality, worth the price. The gift boxes make good holiday presents, especially the good selection of boxes under $25 that you can find at the mall kiosks. If you don't like anything, at least you will have seen scenic St. Clair Square. And me. In an apron. Selling cheese. :-)

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I am still getting used to the physicality of working at the mall kiosk. I'm not used to being on my feet and moving around for four or five hours in a row, so my feet ache at the end of the day. The next day, I feel it in the muscles of my legs and hips. If I've moved stock from the store room to the stand, I feel my shoulders and arms too.

This coming week I'll be working a full schedule, so I've planned meals that will not require any fussing with while I'm on the sofa with my feet up at the end of the day:

Sunday: Spicy polish sausages on a bed of hot sauerkraut; squash and potato casserole.
Monday: Magic Night -- order pizzas.
Tuesday: I'll be working very late. Woof will heat up a can of chili for himself.
Wednesday: Chicken pilaf.
Thursday: Roast pork shoulder in the crockpot; rice; mustard greens.
Friday: Pozole in the crockpot. Need to buy accompaniments of shredded cabbage, radishes, taco chips.
Saturday: Out to dinner with Woof at The Journey buffet restaurant in Swansea, not far from the mall where I work.

Note --
The squash and potato casserole was an amazingly successful experiment with leftovers: mash together the flesh of one roasted butternut squash, about three cups of leftover mashed potatoes and turnips, 1/2 cup warm milk, and 1/4 cup melted butter. Season with basil, thyme, garlic, salt and black pepper. Spread in baking dish and top with parmesan cheese (I might mix more parmesan into the mash itself, next time). Bake, uncovered, at 350 degrees for 25 - 30 minutes. Wow! Flavorful, filling, delicious.

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Today is Thanksgiving Day in the US, and I'm thankful for the Thankful Thursday meme. I don't remember who started it, or who I ganked it from. But setting aside some time every week to be grateful has been very good for me. Sometimes it's hard to find ten things to be grateful for. Those are the times when I need the meme the most.

Lately, life has been pretty good. Sure, money is tight, and there are family members that aren't behaving like my ideal of a perfect family, and I'm not as close to friends as I'd like to be, and we could be healthier. But somehow I feel happy and blessed most of the time.

Right now I am thankful to be posting my "Thankful Thursday" post on time, on a Thursday, and not several weeks late. :-)

I am also thankful for:
1. Hulu, which lets me watch my favorite TV shows when I have time to watch them, not when the networks want to show them.

2. Hot water for bathing and washing up, hot water that I did not have to pump or carry or heat myself. Simple technology is sometimes the very best!

3. Our Prius. It's comfortable, nimble, reliable, and gets almost 50 miles per gallon of gas. Sometimes it's advanced technology that's the best. :-)

4. Not one, not two, but three pies in the refrigerator, just waiting to be eaten this weekend.

5. The temporary seasonal job at the mall. I'm not earning a lot, and it tires me out. But it gets me up and moving, which is healthy for my body. It gets me being productive, which is healthy for my spirit. And it involves selling very delicious products that I truly believe are worth the price, so for the first time in a long time I feel like my work is of service to society in general, if only in a small way.

6. My big crazy family. Even the craziest ones. I wouldn't be me without them.

7. Friends who are like family, only without the baggage. I wish there were some way I could adequately thank all the Tribe, and all the other good friends who have not yet been assimilated into it. Thank you guys for being in my life, for assistance rendered, for opportunities to assist, for acceptance and ass-kicking and love.

8. My two daughters, who have become the women I would have wanted them to be, if I could only have envisioned two such compassionate, intelligent, well-grounded people.

9. My amazing grandbaby Eitan. Watching him discover the world gives me so much joy.

10. Woof, the one who is best for me.

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It's been a busy week here at the hobbit hole. But the biggest news is that my adorable genius grandbaby -- not quite 17 months old now, mind you -- has expanded his vocabulary to include "helicopter" and "umbrella" and "purple". Pronounced "ay-cah-coo", "breh-la", and "puh-puh", yes, but used appropriately!

He is also precociously throwing terrible-two style temper tantrums, but we will speak not of that.

I kept up with last week's dinners until Friday night, when all we wanted to do was to eat cheese and sausage, and play Magic. We'll have the delicious squash soup for lunch today, and save the brownies for dinner.

Here's the plan for this coming week:

Sunday: Pot roast with vegetables, potatoes and gravy; cranberry coleslaw; biscuits with butter; black forest brownies with ice cream.

Monday: Magic Night, but I'll miss most of it because I'm working Monday night. So I'll set up the crockpot once again, this time with meatballs in tomato sauce. There will be buns and grated cheese and chopped onion, so people can make their own meatball sandwiches. Also, home-made cranberry oatmeal cookies.

Tuesday: Woof promised he'd bring a chocolate chip cheesecake to work today, so I'll have to have baked one ahead of time. In fact, I'll bake two ahead of time. You know. Just in case we would happen to need a cheesecake.

Dinner? Either take a salad to dinner at Rivendell, or thaw last week's pozole.

Wednesday: Lettuce salad; pasta with sausage and roasted red peppers; rolls.

Thursday: Thanksgiving Day! We'll bring cheese balls and crackers to the Zoole Family Feast. Also tatties and neeps.

Friday: It's Black Friday, and I'm working. This evening we'll eat leftovers cold from the fridge, and like it.

Saturday: TBD Edited to add -- I'll be working Saturday morning too. Afterwords, Woof and I will go out to eat a big lunch at one of our favorite buffet restaurants, The Journey in Swansea. For supper later that night, we'll have something light and easy to fix, like sandwiches or a can of soup.

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I've got a JOB! It's a seasonal sales job at a local mall, minimum wage, but that's better than what I'm earning sitting at home looking for an IT job. And I like the product I'm selling, Hickory Farms gifts, which is great because I get a sweet employee discount, too.

There are two drawbacks. We're using just one car, and so far I've been scheduled on days when Woof needs that car. The public transport situation to this mall is not so good -- I have to change buses twice -- so I'm allowing plenty of extra time to get there. It feels silly to travel for two hours this afternoon just to work for three hours this evening, but I really don't want to be late. I'm bringing a couple of knitting projects and books; if I catch both transfers on time and get to the mall early, I can hang out at the food court with plenty to do.

The other problem is that I'm really not used to being on my feet. I stand constantly at this job, handing out samples to shoppers or working the register. I only worked 11.5 hours last week but my feet and lower back are killing me. I hope I'll grow better muscles for this soon.

But -- job job job job job! Yay, job!

Cooking has been re-arranged a bit. Here's what we've had so far this week, and what I plan to make in the days to come:

Sunday: Spaghetti with chunky meat sauce, green salad, garlic bread. Woof and nocxavier and I finished off the bottle of Bailey's for dessert. Yum. :-)

Monday: Hotdogs simmered in barbecue sauce for Magic Night. I'm working this evening, so I want everything to be all ready without me. I'm putting 6 pounds of hotdogs covered in barbecue sauce in the crockpot before I leave. The tray with chopped onions and two kinds of pickles is already on the serving table, covered with plastic wrap. I've got gallon jugs full of iced tea and home-made lemonade in the fridge, and I'm setting up a tray with mugs, teas, instant cocoa packets, and two insulated carafes of boiling water.

Tuesday: Take seven-layer salad to dinner at Rivendell.

Wednesday: Rogan Josh, an un-traditional kind made with leftover pork from last week's pozole. Served with rice and bindhi bhaji (okra with onions).

Thursday: Bierock Casserole, green beans, baked apples.

Friday: Squash soup, cheese and crackers, Black Forest brownies.

Saturday: Eat up the leftovers. (Supplement with loaded baked potatoes if necessary.)

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